


Constantly Changing

by LIVEalittleLOVEsome



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Destiny, Drama, F/M, Gen, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-03-28
Updated: 2013-08-23
Packaged: 2017-12-06 19:14:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 19,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/739156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LIVEalittleLOVEsome/pseuds/LIVEalittleLOVEsome
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rose can see the paths and outcomes of every decision that people make. She can pinpoint the exact moment when realization hit her. The realization that she could see things that weren't meant to be seen; the realization that she wasn't normal. The paths affect every aspect of her life, her friendships and her nonexistent relationship with a certain blond boy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

Chapter 1

 

The future, it's always there. Always messily waiting for the hesitated action, the mistaken path, the thoughtless decision. Waiting to change before her eyes. Waiting to ruin, waiting to destruct. Never providing hope. Occasionally loving, never hopeful. Rarely showing glimpses of happiness to overshadow the misery.

Rose is witness to it all. The arrows are constantly playing games with her mind; promising serenity, delivering fear.

* * *

 

The paths converge.

The future spills out.

Without a moment's notice they diverge, spinning the future with the past.

The paths, the arrows and the wayward directions.

Ever changing, omnipresent, never-ending.

* * *

She can pinpoint the exact moment when the realization hit her. The realization that she could see things that weren't meant to be seen; the realization that she wasn't normal. That knowledge doesn't fix the situation, not by any means.

Still, it would be nice to know when or why or how this situation came to define her life. Why the arrows existed, what they meant, and how their knowledge helped anyone.

The paths define her life; define everything she was, everything she is.

* * *

 

Rose Weasley, three years old and fascinated with depicting everything she saw. Enthralled with capturing it and storing it away. Three, and believing nothing could change once she drew it. Having the power to erase the negative and exaggerate the positive had always been a security blanket of sorts for her.

Five when she first drew out the paths in primary school. Carefully, sketching her teacher. Just a simple drawing of her short, blond hair and plump figure. It would have been a normal picture, wouldn't have raised any eyebrows if it wasn't for the arrows over her head. If it wasn't for the maze of arrows spinning and interweaving.

The first time she drew the arrows it felt better. Felt less congested, felt less pressurized…it cleared out her head.

So, Rose did it again.

And again. Anytime she could, she would pull out a piece of paper and start sketching the paths, carefully writing the words lining the paths. Eventually, her teacher noticed her odd behavior. Noticed all Rose's sketches involving her classmates or the teacher and always had paths on top of their heads.

When she wouldn't stop, the teacher talked to her mum. Her parents questioned Rose about the drawings. Rose told them she just drew what she sees.

They thought it was creativity.

She thought they were blind.

She remembered being told to decrease her sketching in school, and that had been the end of that.

Occasionally, she still draws out the arrows, mostly from memory, not daring to do anything too revealing in public.

* * *

Seven and carefree, wandering through Paris. She saw so many people, so many paths and so many ever-changing arrows. They were everywhere. Among the beautified sculptures, juxtaposed next to the sparkling fountains and ravishing hotels there lay so many unique people, so many distinctive paths, so many erratic directions. It was the first time so many people, so many words and paths collided; the first time it made her dizzy with the knowledge.

There were so many extremes, so many possibilities and so many changes from person to person. It was the first time life scared her; the first time the pressures of success and the consequences of failure appeared right before her eyes. From the man in a Muggle suit, carrying a briefcase, walking briskly out of the hotel to the woman a couple blocks down, gathering money in a dirtying plastic container. She couldn't keep it in anymore; she needed to know why everyone ignored the arrows.

She had to know how their eyes flickered past the arrows without a passing thought.

It seemed impossible, yet her mum, dad, and Hugo had done it; they managed to look past the man's arrows. The man they blatantly passed without a thought would die on the same street the next day, and her family did not even take a second look.

It was positively puzzling how everyone disregarded the women asking for work, overlooked her inability to find food for her child tonight. How they could close their eyes to the family starving yet another night. Mystifying how everyone wrapped their head around the future, dealt with the paths changing so fast.

It was awe inducing how even taking a left turn instead of a right changed all the arrows, changed the future mercilessly. The arrows always resulted in sadness, in endless, circling thoughts. Drawing them out helped at first, but now she didn't have any paper, didn't have any crayons to make sense of all the life, change and death right in front of her eyes.

Her first thought had been to ask Mum, but she remembered bringing the topic up couple of times before (with the drawings), remembered the creativity incident. She wanted to ask Dad, he always seemed so happy. She wanted to know how: how to block out the misery and death and sadness following everyone everywhere. She needed to learn how to ignore the arrows, how to block them out like everyone else.

They stayed at a hotel that night, Hugo, Dad, Mum, and Rose. The next day she made sure to pass the street corner, made sure to acknowledge the man on the corner in his final hours. She saw him slouched on the corner of the same building, with the same splotchy, tan trench coat, same tangled grey beard, same half-open blue eyes…same look of sadness. This time he was different, though.

His path, the only path headed straight toward death the previous day had been replaced with various other arrows. Arrows saying he would move in with his grandson in a couple of days. Inscribed words explaining his eventual job at the hardware store, his gradual happiness. Seven when Rose realized the ability of the arrows to change so drastically, change so suddenly.

It gave her hope.

She remembered smiling and her mood instantly getting better. Recalled the sudden urge to climb the Eiffel Tower and run through the Palace of Versailles. Upon the questioning of her parents on her sudden mood change she replied, "Everything is going to be okay, he's going to be okay and it's a good life after all."

Her parents laughed at Rose's childish theatrics and continued their walk through the city.

The rest of the trip was a blur of paths and laughter and tourist attractions, but it was the first time she recognized the speed of life. First time she recognized how quickly life could change, how quickly the paths shifted, how sometimes, everything worked out for the better.

* * *

At nine, revelation struck.

Rose heard Uncle Harry sighing to Aunt Ginny, "I wonder how hectic it'll get once the Head Auror comes back into the office."

Rose wondered how Aunt Ginny could keep the path to herself, how she could sit there and watch as Uncle Harry made himself grim with worry without saying anything.

Rose had been gaping at Aunt Ginny the next day when she squealed in surprise and delight when Harry told her the news. In fact, Rose seemed to be the only one at the dinner table who couldn't feign shock when _obviously_ the arrows had shown the news for so long. When Uncle Harry exclaimed his new position as head Auror, everyone's jaw dropped. It almost felt as if they completely blocked out the arrows from their lives.

* * *

"Albus, Rose don't go in the lake! Stay out of trouble!" Rose's mum had called out as they ran straight toward the forest, straight toward the lake.

As always, they were panting and dodging logs and wayward twigs, shouting as they sprinted. They climbed toward their section of the backyard forest. Unusually, Rose paused. She did not follow Al to the cross-stepping stones the lake. She checked his paths and, sure enough, they showed him slipping on the third rock, falling, breaking an arm and getting in trouble for going to the lake.

"Al, maybe we shouldn't cross the lake today."

"But Rose…we have to! How else can we get away from invisibility-cloaked dragons following us? We need to get to our spot and wait for the fire to cease."

Momentarily distracted from the task at hand, she replied: "We fought the invisible dragons last time. And the time before that. It's my turn now. Now they have to be vampires riding on centaurs under the spell of a warlock."

"Rose , that's just  _stupid_. Why wouldn't we be able to see the vampires? And vampires are boring. And stupid. Dragons can fly and breathe fire and Uncle Charlie always gets the coolest scars from them."

"No, they're always dragons. Dragons are the boring ones, Al. And the vampires are under a spell, we can't see them. Obviously."

"Fine, then! Rose, if we cross the lake then they can be your stupid vampires riding their stupid centaurs."

"They're not stupid and they're under a spell! And anyway, Al, you're going to fall on the stone."

"I never fall!"

"It's in your path though. Can you just skip the third stone? And hurry I can hear their hooves coming closer!"

"What paths? You always talk about paths. No one ever understands what you mean, Rose."

Shock, confusion. Was she really the only one? The thought had always circulated within her and she always feared the answer. Maybe Al was just kidding. Then Rose glance at his face and it lacked its usual grin.

"Wh-What do you mean you don't understand?"

"Okay Rose, whatever. Aunt Hermione will call us in soon; let's cross before it gets dark. It's just hard to keep up with you sometimes."

They continued to play, but Rose was in a daze the rest of the time.

Al couldn't see.

Her parents couldn't see.

No one dealt with the constant spinning paths and arrows.

Nine years old when she realized no one else saw them.

Nine, when she realized she was the only one.

* * *

Then she was eleven and Platform Nine and three quarters was a mesh of lives, arrows and paths. It felt like Paris all over again. Added to the claustrophobia however, was the anxiety of finally, finally going to Hogwarts, leaving Hugo, Mum and Dad and the reminiscence of her childhood.

She tried her best to avoid looking at too many people, especially students. Today the paths were changing especially quickly, and every decision made, every mistaken gesture or accidental eye contact determined all too much.

She watched as a short, brunette smiled shyly at an older looking, slightly muscular, black haired boy and with that small gesture both their arrows interwove, instantly changing friend circles, relationships…altering their future careers.

She tried to keep her eyes down after that, their encounter already had her head spinning. There were already too much pressure and too many people and none of it was helping her anxiety. After jokes and hugs and goodbyes and a few tears were exchanged, she boarded the train with Al by her side.

Rose ignored the lightning fast paths, currently changing madly in pace with the continuously opening compartment doors and frantically shuffling feet. She kept all of it to herself, kept the knowledge that her year was unconsciously picking their future with every glance and wayward smile.

She blocked most of it out. Much to her dismay, she found herself still concentrating on the blond boy her dad pointed out a few moments ago.

She made sure not to focus her attention on any one person, not before she learnt their names, knew them and their story. But her dad just had to go and point out that Malfoy boy. She could still picture his paths in her head. And maybe it was that slight rebellion thing Aunt Ginny always talked about, but now she wanted to know more about him, need to know more.

She craved to know why his paths were lined the way they were, diverging so oddly. Of course, that was crazy. That was precisely the absurdity that got people into trouble. Of course, she wouldn't act on that stupid thought.

So, she sat in a compartment with Albus circling endlessly in a mass of contradictions. Waiting for others to join, dreading the influence she would inevitably have on them, looking forward to Hogwarts, fearing the compartment door opening, and hoping that it would.


	2. Chapter 2

Al and Rose held their breaths as the sounds of shuffling of feet and doors closing grew faint. Their train compartment still held only two, and an unconventional silence rose between them. Rose couldn't handle the thoughts and doubts circulating in her head. She needed a distraction, and it was clear that Al was the only person who could provide one.

"So, Al, looks like it's only going to be you and me."

"Really, Rose?" He quickly looked around the compartment with wide eyes, "Oh, my mistake. I thought we were surrounded by invisibility-cloaked dragons."

"Sarcasm really wasn't necessary. But whatever, it's not like that's going to stop you. So, d'you wanna skip the whole 'which house will we be in' discussion and play chess?"

"Sarcasm is always necessary. Always. And sure, don't feel like talking to you anyway. But we're not playing chess. We have to play cards— I bought a pack with James last week."

"But chess is—fine whatever, we'll play cards. Don't feel like arguing with you either." They grinned at each other and Al searched for the cards.

* * *

A knock jerked Rose's and Al's attention toward the compartment door. Half an hour into the trip and both had given hopes (or fears) of people joining them. They half-heartedly continued to play a card game that was frequently played at their previous school.

In front of their compartment stood a girl wearing jeans and a huge smile, waving energetically at them. The paths above her head, unlike previous meetings Rose witnessed, remained secure as their eyes met. Rose motioned for her to come in as Al went to open the door for her.

Of course, the first encounter they made with someone has to be saturated with awkwardness.

The girl managed to keep the smile plastered on her face as she glanced between them. She seemed to deliberate whether to come in as Al fumbled with the door. Rose let out a sigh when finally, Al yanked it open, and she walked in.

"Hi guys! I'm Christy, just wanted to walk around and say hi to as many people as I can! So far, I've been getting mixed results with this, but you two seem nice. What are your names? I'm Christy. Oh, sorry, I think I've said that already. Anyway, hope I didn't scare you away. Mum says I can be downright terrifying."

Rose wondered how someone could speak so much, say so little, and still appear so confident while having an ever-present smile on her face. Rose glanced at Al, who seemed slightly off balance—not quite sure what to say, not quite sure what to do. Rose stepped up, she wasn't about to get rid of the only person who spoke to her (regardless of how crazy she was).

"Hi. Umm, I'm Rose…and this is Al," she motioned to Al, who continued to stare at his feet. "Yeah, don't mind him; he's a little…umm shy." Rose caught the look Al quickly shot at her.

"Hi, Rose…Al," she continued to smile at them. When she realized Rose had nothing more to add, Christy took a breath. Helplessly, Rose thought she was going to leave. She wasn't sure why she liked this odd girl, maybe it was her bubbly personality, her consistent arrows, or the fact that she was the only unrelated person she spoke to all day. Regardless of what is was, she still felt relieved when Christy took a seat next to her instead of bolting out the door.

"So what house do you think you'll be sorted into, guys? I honestly have no idea. I think I'm a little bit of every house, but I don't think I'll fit perfectly in any house, if you know what I mean. Any ideas Al…Rose?"

Rose glanced to Al, giving him a chance to redeem himself in Christy's eyes. She knew he would only unbearably complain later if she didn't help him out. As he opened his mouth, Rose could see Al's arrows slightly changing.

"Well…my dad told me we get to choose what house we get put in. And I mean I guess that's comforting, but…well…like you said I really don't know for sure either. I mean how am I supposed to decide if some ancient hat can't decide for me." Al smiled awkwardly up at Christy, trying (and failing) to match her smile.

Rose shot a look at Al, he didn't even mention this to her.

Christy nodded enthusiastically at Al, and soon the three of them somehow managed to hold a decent conversation with one another. The entire time Christy's arrows stayed put, and Rose marveled at how easy it was to talk to her.

A half an hour or so later, Christy rose from her seat. She told them she'll be sure to see them around the castle and speak to them soon, and that she wanted to meet some more people. Rose and Al waved goodbye to her, and a silence enveloped them soon as she was out the door. It was a comfortable silence, one often shared by family members. Without a third party, both of them were left tangled up in their own thoughts, nervously contemplating the future, and not bothering to keep it hidden from the other.

* * *

The first time Rose saw Hogwarts was anticlimactic. Sure, it was beautiful. Sure, she continued to stare at it as they crossed the lake. But it wasn't time stopping, wasn't life changing, and wasn't as great as everyone had lead her to believe. Much to her surprise, it didn't seem as if the view of the castle changed anyone's arrows too much. Strangely, the platform and train ride had been much more critical in the determination of the students' futures.

The whispers and murmurs grew into loud voices as they walked through the castle and as everyone marvelled at its inner and outer beauty. Rose didn't speak too much, she had already heard the typical nervous chatter about house selection one too many times. A tall, dark haired professor led them through the castle and explained the Sorting Hat ritual. Rose didn't pay much attention, by now it was common knowledge that the sorting hat sorted.

They were lead into the Great Hall and Rose was blasted with so many arrows and so many paths that she had difficulty walking straight, let alone thinking clear. The thousands of students sitting in such an enclosed area in such close proximity resulted in muddled paths and disturbed arrows, unreadable words and an endless wave of confusion.

Rose made sure to keep her head down and remain another nameless face in the sea of first years. It was hard enough to know where each one of her classmates was probably going to be sorted. It was worse to realize how their lives were moulded from this small decision.

It finally sunk in, as Rose managed to take a quick look away from her feet. She had just realized the sheer number of people she would have to deal with - the unimaginably large number of arrows and people and disappointments. It was easy at home; she only had her parents' and Hugo's arrows to worry about. They didn't worry her too much; they led ordinary lives and she knew most of the details.

Her muggle school was very small, held about a hundred students in a small building and had approximately seven students per class. Rose grew up with those kids, and they had had grown pretty close. Their arrows weren't very distracting so they hadn't been much of a problem.

But this was different. This was bad.

However much she tried to prepare herself, Rose failed. Already. She just arrived and the disappointment, the panic spreading through her was everything she always wanted to prevent. Rose simply wasn't used to so many people, and wasn't sure how she would ever get used to it. Couldn't imagine ever leading an ordinary school life.

Above all that stress was the problem in front of her. Because however much Rose Weasley knew about other students and the houses they were going to get sorted into, she knew nothing about her own arrows. She did not know the direction her life would take and had no idea how to direct it. She wasn't sure if it was a blessing or a curse.

In that way, Rose didn't differ from her classmates. In that way, she was just as frightened by the Sorting Hat. The seemingly simple object would dictate the direction of her life and that of all the other students, who sat mere meters away from her. Keeping her eyes trained on the floor, Rose continued to shuffle forward in the line as they made their way through the Great Hall. Rose dazedly realized she stood at the end of the line, for the first time noticing that she was going to be the last one sorted.

* * *

The Headmaster spoke, warmly welcoming all the students and greeting new ones, but Rose managed to block it all out. She had her eyes trained on the floor and was working overtime to erase all the arrows she previously saw.

The Sorting Hat started singing and though she tried, Rose couldn't keep her eyes away from the front of the Hall.

She heard the first few words of the song. The rest of it was drowned out by shock.

A moment ago, Rose had always seen arrows on top of every person's head. Every single person she met had the arrows.

Never had she seen objects with arrows.

When Rose saw the paths above the Sorting Hat, she didn't know what to think. When she looked closer, when she focused in, there were only two paths above the hat. One lead to a long life (if it was called that) where it continued to sort for years to come. Another showed the hat's eternal boredom and mild unhappiness.

The paths were simple, and yet the fact that she could see the future of a hat, a hat that dictated the paths of so many people, left her confused. Drawn from it by cheers and applause, Rose drew her eyes back to the floor, where it was safe and didn't lead to unnecessary thoughts before such a big event. The woman who previously spoke to the first years announced the first name and the sorting ceremony commenced. Rose hardly paid attention to where anyone was sorted, but made sure to watch when Al was being sorted.

When she heard the last name Malfoy, Rose couldn't help but look up (merely for curiosity). At the station, the boy's arrows moved rapidly and for some reason Rose was mildly interested (she wouldn't dare to admit it, though). Rose watched as he plastered an obviously fake smile on his face and sat on the stool waiting for the outcome. A moment later, the hat burst out with: "SLYTHERIN!"

A split second of silence followed, and then the usual laud broke out.

"Potter, Albus!" Al hesitantly walked forward, carefully placed the hat on his head, and promptly shut his eyes. And waited. Everyone waited. Rose wasn't sure if it always took this long, but if everyone went at this pace no one would ever receive an opportunity to taste the welcoming feast. Finally, when Rose had given all hope of ever getting sorted herself, the hat took a deep breath and: "RAVENCLAW!"

Applause erupted, and Rose was sure everyone was as excited to have that sorting over with as she was. She glanced at the Gryffindor table, seeking out James. He seemed okay with the sorting; in fact he clapped along with the rest of the hall. She smiled; Rose always knew James wasn't as big of a git as he led others to believe.

The sorting didn't surprise her; she knew Al's arrows pointed to Ravenclaw for a while. She always expected it to change, though. She always expected (hoped) that the arrows would get re-written. Rose shook her head—this wasn't the time to think such distracting thoughts.

A few minutes later, Christy was sorted. Much faster than Al's sorting (she thought everyone's would be) and Christy got put in Gryffindor.

As the girl in front of her got sorted into Slytherin, Rose took a deep breath, listened for "Weasley, Rose", and approached the stool.

As soon as the hat touched her head, she heard a gasp. "My, my girl I've never seen the likes of this, this …talent before. Very interesting. Interesting indeed. Where shall I place you? A gift like this could corrupt, it could heal. Let me see..."

Suddenly Rose felt heat excreting from her head, followed by gasps from the crowd and prolonged silence from the hat itself. She searched from the brim of the hat and flinched away. Her hand burned.

With a gasp she realized what had happened.

The Sorting Hat caught on fire.

The Sorting Hat caught on fire when she was wearing it.

She set the Sorting Hat on fire.

She sat motionlessly as the Headmaster rushed over to her and stream of water was aimed above her head and panic settled in the hall and in her chest.

* * *

_A gift like this could corrupt, it could heal. Let me see..."_

The Sorting Hat's last words.


	3. Chapter 3

He was rushing toward her. The world was spinning and with it, chaos erupted all around her. She shut her eyes, attempting to block out the students below, with their disorderly arrows and fearful looks, and the panic from her memory. She had done it. It was over. Only an hour into Hogwarts and off she would go to Azkaban or St Mungos (if she was lucky).

Rose reminded herself to take deep breaths, to keep her eyes shut, to push away the tears. She could feel the presence of the Headmaster beside her and she wasn't sure if she possessed the capability of opening her eyes and facing the reality of the situation. In the background, she vaguely heard someone speaking, telling everyone not to panic, and convincing the school to calm down because of her.

She set the Sorting Hat alight.

Or the Sorting Hat burst into flames on its own accord, coincidently in the middle of her sorting, conveniently while it was on her head.

It just wasn't fair.

Rose couldn't help it, a tear managed to escape her squeezed closed eyes. She felt it trickle down her cheek before swiftly swiping it away.

She was not going to cry. And with that thought she wiped another stray tear away.

She felt a tapping on her shoulder, followed by a, "Ms. Weasley?" This was it. She prepared herself for the worst and cautiously opened her eyes, painfully aware of the droplets that freely fell down. Rose took a deep breath and looked up at the Headmaster, fearing the arrows she would see, dreading the ones she wouldn't.

"Ms. Weasley could you please follow me?" The headmaster walked in front of her, walking between the house tables of Ravenclaw and Gryffindor. She took another deep breath and wiped her tears, and lowered her eyes. Rose diligently but fearfully followed him. Attempting to put the whispers behind her and out of her mind, she walked swiftly through the hall. It didn't work— she could still hear everything, heard snippets of conversations that confirmed her fears, her insecurities. It took all of her strength not to give up and collapse right there. She just felt like a limbless body of bones, flesh, and tears barely hanging on to a façade.

"Who would have thought, the child of Ron and Hermione Weasley—a dark Witch."

"The nerve of the girl, showing off such evil powers. I can't wait until she gets shipped to Azkaban, where she belongs."

"What a freak. She'll burn the entire castle if we don't kick her out."

Rose couldn't believe how quickly she made enemies.

Her pace slowed and it became harder and harder for her to continue. Just as she lost all motivation to put one foot in front of the either, a hand enclosed her own, and gave it a squeeze. She looked up and saw Al, smiling at her reassuringly. He lied and told her that it was going to be alright. Even though she could hear the worry in his voice, could see the fear in his eyes, somehow, he managed to give her strength and enough confidence to smile at him (in an equally false manner), and continue walking. She tried harder to keep the whispers out, but they managed to slither into her ears. She almost reached the end of the hall when she heard some different opinions.

"She didn't do it, look how scared she looks. This could have happened to any of us. It's not fair to blame an innocent girl when it was just a coincidence that the hat was on her head when it…err..caught on fire.

She heard someone else: "Yeah, it definitely wasn't her fault. Imagine how frightened she is. I mean, if it scared some people when us when they were so far away, imagine how frightened the girl was when the hat exploded on top of her bloody head."

"That must have been the worst first day anyone ever imagined, I mean everything that could have gone wrong…did. I don't think I would be able to face the world after something like that, especially as a first year. She must be so brave.

And that last comment she heard, pushed the tears away, helped her lift her head away from the god-forsaken floor and look straight ahead. She was out the hall, but looked back to the source of the voices. It felt like all she was doing was taking deep breathes today, but she took one, gathered up her strength to smile, and glanced back at the general location of the nice whisperers.

Once again, she was overwhelmed by the clump of paths and lives but just for a second she ignored all of that and held her smile for a second and looked back. The Headmaster was observing her with furred eyebrows and a crinkled forehead.

"Ms. Weasley, please follow me to my chambers. We have much to discuss. I'm sorry you had to go through that, there was no other way to get you out," he explained as he took long strides. Rose scurried to keep up. Rose wasn't sure if he was referring to the hat bursting in flames, or the offensive (honest) comments of her classmates. Never the less, she was enthused that he wasn't directly shipping her off to Azkaban. Still, his paths didn't leave her with much cause for celebration. They didn't allude to a sentence in Azkaban, but now she could see the difficulties he'll have to face because of her

"Oh, it's alright, Headmaster, sir," Rose replied, her voice raspy and unfamiliar sounding.

"I'm sure you're as confused as the rest of us are. I'm sorry that you had to be exposed to such as horrific event on your very first day. I hope the rest of your Hogwarts career won't include similar experiences."

"Oh, thanks, Headmaster, sir." Rose let out a sigh of relief. Letting her face relax, demanding her breath to slow, begging the rhythm of her heart to return to a normal pace. She wasn't in trouble. It was going to be okay (she still didn't believe it, though).

He continued to lead her through the castle, turning at steep corners and continuing on for long corridors, walking along with the moving staircases, the talking portraits, and the knights. Finally, they arrived at the blank wall.

She heard him murmur a password, and the gargoyle turned, revealing a staircase. He ushered her toward it and up to what she assumed was his office.

His office was neat, with a desk at the far end of it with neatly placed piles of paper. She sat down and he sat across from her.

"Ms. Weasley, I have several questions that will need answering to find the source of this. I trust that you will provide me with the appropriate answers and this will be solved without further panic."

"I will do my best, Sir."

"Good. Now, Ms. Weasley, tell me, what exactly did the Sorting Hat tell you before it burst into flames?"

"Well, Professor…" She wasn't a bad liar, she just didn't have much experience. She was always ready with an answer, always good at avoiding questions, and injecting vagueness when necessary. Rose knew this wouldn't be so easy, there was no avoiding the question here. She didn't even understand why it had happened, but feared that it was connected to her arrows; yet she wasn't prepared to tell the headmaster that. Still, she wasn't sure if she could lie.

The headmaster raised his eyebrows when she didn't continue, prompting her with a, "Yes, Ms. Weasley?"

"It's all…umm…a bit hazy, but well, the hat told me that I was…special and that I was gifted. It said I could either do good thing or…umm…bad things with my….gifts." Rose breathed out, finally. It sounded horribly false to her ears and she could only imagine how it all sounded to her Headmaster – like a dishonest, attention-seeking little girl seeking special treatment. She glanced at the Headmaster's face, drawing her eyes away from the floor. His arrows still hadn't changed, and still Rose wasn't sure whether that was a good sign or a bad one.

"Well…that sounds like a relatively normal sorting to me. Was that all it said to you?" The headmaster searched her face, but Rose broke contact and looked again to the floor.

"Yes, sir. That was all it said before it…umm…burst into flames." Rose fidgeted, sure that the Headmaster could tell there was more to the story. She wasn't sure where the lies begun and the truth started. The words just started tumbling out of her mouth and 'think before you speak' logic had obviously been lost on her.

Rose started scratching the back of her neck, crossed and uncrossed her legs, scratched her face, and glanced around the office as she waited for his response. She practiced the deep breaths her mum had taught her. Surprisingly, they actually helped her out today, on multiple occasions.

"It's understandable that you're scared Ms. Weasley, this would have been a traumatic experience for anyone, but I need you to help me so we can understand what has happened here. No one is blaming you, but I need to cover all the possibilities."

"I—I understand, Sir." Rose didn't understand where he was going with this, didn't want to comprehend the facts of the situation.

"Ms. Weasley, did you notice anything strange when you were being sorted?"

"Well, I had my eyes closed, so no, I didn't see anything…" she quickly added a, "Sir."

"With the Sorting Hat, I mean, did you notice anything strange?"

"Oh, well…umm…it didn't sort me?" Rose knew it wasn't the time for jokes but she was lost for an appropriate response.

"Ms. Wesley, yes it didn't sort you, and that is just one of the problems we will face because of this. Whether it be luck or coincidence that you were the last one to be sorted this year, I don't know. But a new method will have to be developed, and soon. You, on the other hand, well, I'm sure it has been a long day for you, surely. I know you must be hungry and tired, so you will surely get to sleep in a dormitory tonight. The question is which house. We will need to place you in a dormitory, and of course, this can be a temporary or permanent thing, once we... figure out another sorting method."

Of course, this would happen to her. Rose would have to sort herself.

She took a deep breath, and contemplated the irony of the situation. Or she thought it was irony, her mum talked about it when she was reading one of her books. If it had been anyone else, Rose would have seen their paths, seen the house that gave them the best future (of course, it wasn't set in stone) and she would have had something to back up her decision.

But decisions for Rose were always difficult. Because she knew. She knew how every decision affected everything in her life, knew of the consequences she would inevitable face if she chose one House over the other. While others could randomly draw conclusions and make remarks about destiny and soul mates and everything working out at the end –Rose knew the truth—there simply was no such thing. She would love to believe there was, would love to be blissfully oblivious to the future and the events that marked it, but sadly that was not the case.

Maybe she was over exaggerating the situation, Rose knew that the Headmaster would find a new method of sorting with relative ease and speed, at least according to his current arrows. Rose knew the new method, which continued to change so quickly in the Headmaster's arrows that she gave up trying to figure it out, would sort her well. But she didn't think she would change Houses when she already created such a big controversy only on her first day.

She let out a sigh when she realized just how much she was going to face when she left this room.

"Ms. Weasley, I understand that this is an incredibly difficult decision and that most students would never dream of being put in such a position. I know you have already had an…eventful day, but I think it would be best if you settle down in a House so you could get comfortable here at Hogwarts. I'm sorry that you have to do this, truly. Maybe some advice would prove beneficial if my recollections of my own adolescent confusions are anything to go by.

Rose took a breath and before she could stop herself, voiced her thoughts. "I just have no idea. None. I don't fit anywhere, and I'm not just saying that. I truly believe that I don't belong anywhere. I mean, I'm not courageous, or really smart, or ambitious, or trusting or anything. I'm not any of those things and I don't know."

She was shocked at the words that tumbled out of her mouth. This unfamiliar openness with her feelings and insecurities made her cringe. She always had her heart and her mind guarded, and this was her Headmaster, someone she barely knew, who now knew too much about her. The anxiety of the entire day, the stress of the situation was wearing her guard down. If she wasn't careful, she would probably begin incoherently explaining the paths to him.

"Ms. Wea—Rose, I can assure you that you are not alone in that feeling of not fitting in. The majority of students feel like that when they walk into Hogwarts, feel overwhelmed and feel like they will never belong. The truth is, everyone could fit into any house if they wanted to. Everyone has some Gryffindor, some Ravenclaw, some Slytherin, some Hufflepuff, in them. "

He looked at Rose's blank stare and added, "Maybe you should think in terms of not the qualities you possess, but the ones you wish to possess, or even the qualities you value most."

Rose contemplated his words for a moment.

"Well…I –I value honesty… stability…relationships…and …confidence, I guess."

"And which house do you think best exemplifies those values, Rose?"

"Merlin, a Gryffindor? Me? I can't be…I'm—I'm not cut out for it. I'm not brave, or confident, or anything like my parents or Uncle Harry or Aunt Ginny."

"Rose, I think you would do marvelous in Gryffindor. Of course, once we… settle a new way to sort you could always get re-sorted, but I don't think that will be necessary. And remember, bravery comes in different varieties and shades. There are those who are outwardly brave, who take risks for others, who are the first ones to take a risk. But then, there are others who are silently brave, who always put others before themselves, who silently fight their own battles, who act only when they have to but know when to act. I think you fit into those categories, Ms. Weasley."

She was at a loss of words. It felt so weird, felt so strange, that this man who she met mere minutes ago knew so much about her, and did everything in his power to help her understand even when there were obviously more important things to concentrate on (like the Sorting Hat she set on fire).

"Thank you so much, Sir, I really appreciate this. Thank you."

"Of course, Ms. Weasley, it was no trouble. Now, you're probably starving. I expect that the feast is still carrying on. I can take you back to the Great Hall, I don't think you know you're way around the castle quiet yet."

"Okay, sure, Sir, thanks." Rose replied, forcing a smile and followed him out of the office.

She paused at the entrance to the hall.

At her face he smiled, "I'm sure no one will notice you entering the hall. I'll stay outside. And I understand these next few days may be a little troublesome but remember that they will pass and this will all be in the past sooner than later."

"Thank you, Sir. I'll be sure to remember."

Rose took a deep breath, smiled and walked through the door, pretending like she wasn't overwhelmed with paths and arrows and her heart wasn't beating wildly out of her chest.


	4. Chapter 4

On occasion, when people make comments others inevitably start believing them.

Out of nowhere, one of Rose's paintings with too many shaky lines and uneven tones beatified in front of her eyes after listening to her dad or mum compliment it. Rose never classified herself as brave or noble, but after the Headmaster repeatedly expressed his views on her courageousness, out of nowhere, confidence slowly settled in. She walked into the hall, not with her head held high, but at least not with it hung low. Walking straight ahead, with the roar of laughter and buzz of conversations around her, it started getting easier. It was slightly less torturous ignoring everyone around her and concentrating on the task at hand—searching for Al and a place to sit.

She looked up, briefly glancing around tables, but still, the paths before her were too much. She slowed her pace, helplessly searching and feeling eyes on her. There was a tap on her back and dreadfully she turned around, prepared for the worst. Quickly she masked her shock when she saw James, looking slightly worried and pushing the boy next to him aside, gesturing for her to sit.

James flashed her smile, "Trying to out-flame everyone else on your first day, Rose? Because if that's what you were going for…well I'm a bit jealous."

"Yeah, that's exactly what I was going for…the power of fire and unpredictability of the flame. You caught me." She smiled weakly at him as she filled up her plate. It felt like ages since she last ate.

"No, but really…Rose…are you…err… you know….alright?"

"James, is that worry in your tone? Aww, I didn't know you cared." It was easier for Rose to pretend, pretend at least for a bit that it didn't matter and fake a nonchalant attitude.

"Rose…please, I'm trying. What did Podmore want with you?

It occurred to her that that she didn't realize what the Headmaster's name was. That was just like her, to blank out on the present and get consumed into the vortex of the future. Rose made patterns in her mashed potatoes as she collected her thoughts. She could feel James growing tense beside her and she knew she couldn't avoid it forever. Before she spoke, Al came out of nowhere and squeezed onto the other side of Rose.

"Rose, Merlin… Rose. Are you alright? Sorry, that's a stupid question, of course you aren't. What happened? I mean, you don't know what happened, obviously. But I mean, what—"

"Al, could you bloody breathe and at least attempt to pass for a sane person. Rose was about to explain what Podmore said before you… interrupted like a fish—"

"James, shut up." Al replied.

Rose felt the first genuine smile escape at their antics. It felt like she hadn't smiled in ages.

"So…Rose?" Al said. There went her smile.

"You two are possibly the most annoying, irritating—" Rose begun.

"Rose, do you have to be so difficult?"

"I was getting there, James. Anyway, Podmore just asked me if I knew what happened and what the Sorting Hat said and then he told me to sort myself and now, I'm apparently a Gryffindor. Not according to the Sorting Hat, because it kind of, you know, doesn't exist…because of me." Her voice cracked toward the end and she could tell that she gave too much away, just by the looks James and Al were giving her.

She saw James's arrows changing, scattering and rearranging themselves to add her name amid his future, creating 'accidental' check-ups and forced fireplace chats with their parents.

"Rose, its okay. No one's going to remember this in a few weeks. And—" Al started saying before James cut him off.

"Rose, you're a Gryffindor! That's great, we're gonna have a blast without this freak studying away in the library with his bloody Ravenclaw friends."

Al shot James a look, but when Rose let out a laugh, the tension between them eased.

"As I was saying, you just set a hat on fire. Things like that happened all the time at Hogwarts…Right, James?" Al continued.

It took a while for James to catch on, "Oh, yeah…definitely. Once this fifth year set her hair on fire and ran through the school until a professor threatened her with detention. I wanted to do it too but couldn't get the bloody spell right without burning my face."

"Thanks, Al, James," Rose said laughing. She would never admit it, but her family always found ways to cheer her up. She felt so much better, like she could breathe easily and the world wasn't completely against her.

* * *

Too soon, she left Al and James and followed the older students to her new dormitory. As she shuffled among the other first years, her eyes continued their tradition of meeting with the floor. She heard snippets of conversation all around her, but was too tired to make an effort to join. When the group reached a portrait of a fat lady, they stopped. And when Shelly, the prefect who led them there, explained importance of passwords, Rose realized she should have paid a little more attention to direction—finding her classes would be impossible tomorrow morning.

It was all a blur for Rose, it didn't feel real. Nothing felt real. Her thoughts basically consisted of, "I'm a Gryffindor…too many arrows…head down…when is this day going to end."

Finally, Shelly stopped talking and they were free to go up their rooms.

Rose headed up the staircase, painfully aware of the eyes watching her as she did so. Fastening her pace, she walked into the first year dormitory and collapsed on the bed closest to her. Letting out a deep breath, she closed her eyes hoping childishly that this had all been a bad dream.

What seemed like a few moments later, she felt someone taping her shoulder once again, along with voices around the room. Cautiously, Rose opened her eyes, fearing what else she would have to deal with today.

"Rose, I'm so, so sorry. This is actually my bed, see the bags next to it? They're mine, I'm sure you just didn't see them. I wouldn't have minded sleeping in your bed but you looked pretty uncomfortable too, and well, I thought it would be better if you were comfortable, considering how long this day must have been for you."

"Oh, Christy, I'm sorry I didn't see. I'll get out of your way." Rose gave her a quick smile and looked for the bed with her bags. She didn't see them. Just her luck. Of course, after everything, her bags wouldn't even be in the bloody—oh there they were. She numbly walked to the bed, got under the covers, and drew the curtains.

There goes the nightmare theory, she thought, and drifted to sleep.

* * *

The next morning was a sound wave of buzzing and beeping chaos. Rose, always a light sleeper, woke up at the first beeping sound. Surprised at the sound, she opened her curtains and looked for the source. Coming out of a small, lumpy toad next to someone's bed erupted a beep-beep-beep. The girl in the bed didn't seem to wake, not until another sound went off from another bed. Within minutes, the entire dormitory contained beeping toads and croaking flowers and singing fruits but still, no one actually got out of their beds.

Deciding that something needed to be done, but not wanting to make a scene, she grabbed her uniform and a towel from her luggage and exclaimed, "I guess I'll use the bathroom first? Our first class is in an hour right?"

"ughd" was the response she received.

Rose never needed alarms to wake her up, her loud family was enough to wake the entire country up, and her dormitory didn't seem much different. She quickly showered, dressed, and brushed her teeth; Rose would always fasten the pace of everything when nerves got to her.

Finally, everyone else woke up and managed to get dressed in time. Rose was about to walk down to the Great Hall by herself, hoping that miraculously she would somehow manage to find her way there.

"Hey, Rose! Do you wanta go down to breakfast with me? I'm almost done, just give me a sec." Christy asked.

Rose sighed in relief, smiling, she turned around and replied, "Yeah, sure."

Rose was still shocked at Christy's arrows, since she met Al and Rose they barely changed. Slightly disturbed at Al's place in Christy's future, Rose looked away and focused on Christy, who was rummaging through her luggage.

"Did you lose something?" Rose asked, mainly to distract herself from the arrows and her own frantic thoughts. She wondered how horrible lessons would be, if anyone would even want to talk to her after what happened. Well, at least she had Christy, who surprisingly hadn't even mentioned the hat bursting into flames. Rose thought Christy wouldn't be able to stop talking or asking questions about it, but she got it wrong. She liked how unnosy and unWesasley Christy was. That probably wasn't a word, but Al wasn't inside her head to correct her grammar. There wa—

"Yeah, my lucky earrings. I saved them for the first actual school day and I know I packed them, I just have no idea where they are." Christy thankfully cut of Rose's inner monologue. Christy's usual smile wasn't as wide and Rose could tell something about these earrings meant a lot to her.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Rose didn't know what else to say. Hopefully these awkward conversations wouldn't happen so often once she got older and less awkward. Rose focused on Christy's arrows, and surprisingly, the earrings changed her paths. There were two paths, one where she went without the earrings and one where she found them in her luggage. The one without the earrings included Christy getting in trouble, getting lost, and getting into an argument with Al. The one with the earrings included a relatively normal day, with nothing extra-ordinary happening.

"You know what, its fine. We'll both be late to breakfast and class." Christy was standing up and grabbing her books. Normally, Rose would have nodded and followed her, but she wanted things to go right for Christy.

"No, wait. Did you check your smaller luggage bag? It might be in there."

"Oh my gosh, Rose, I completely forgot about the other bag. You're the best!" She quickly searched through the smaller bag, and beamed at Rose as she held up two pearls. "I found them, thank you so much! I wouldn't feel the same without them."

Christy got up and hugged Rose, who masked her surprise and quickly hugged her back. Normally, she wasn't the hugging type, but she wasn't about to push away possibly the only person other than a family member willing to speak to her.

"Yeah, no problem. But we should get going if we don't want to be late." Rose smiled at her and Christy led the way to the Great Hall.

Times like this, Rose didn't mind the paths, times when the future was actually of use to people. Of course, there was the chance that Christy would still have a bad day, would still get into some argument get lost and get in trouble, but at least it was minimized. Maybe, maybe today wouldn't be such a horrible day after all.

* * *

Rose sat with Christy during breakfast, and both of them quickly threw some food into their mouths and gulped down milk. They received their schedules from Shelly, who advised them to arrive at breakfast earlier. Both of them apologized to her, but after she left, exploded in a fit of giggles. Rose wasn't sure what had even been so funny, but for the first time since she got here, she wasn't drenched in worry or fearing people's eyes or the future around her.

Their first class was Herbology, which eased Rose's tension further. How intimidating could Neville be?

Christy and Rose, along with three other Gryffindor girls (Rose still didn't know their names), found their way to Herbology. Though they weren't late, as they walked in, more than half the class was seated and glanced back to watch them enter. Self-conscious and unprepared, once again, for the bombardment of the paths thrown in her face, Rose ducked her head and quickly found a stool at the long table. Christy promptly followed and sat next to her. Rose smiled at her, her shock at Christy's seeting choice apparent.

Not that she went out of her way to notice, but Rose saw Scorpius and realized they were with the Slytherins. Hopefully, James exaggerated the nastiness of the Slytherins, much like he exaggerated everything else. Rose couldn't believe people were rude just because of their house, because well, look at her, she wasn't in any position to judge.

Moments later, Neville started the class. Rose took one look at his arrows and groaned. Of course. He  _would_  want to embarrass the class on their first day with something like that. Hopefully, she wouldn't be paired up with someone too terrible. She was tempted to look up at everyone's arrows and see who she was with, but there were already around forty people in the room, she didn't want to make her head spin this early.

"First year, first class, first day, I can remember how nerve-racking all of this was to me. So, accordingly, I planned a little activity to start off with. Now, I know some of you will hate me for this, but others, well, you can just thank me later." Neville briefly paused, long enough for Christy to whisper, "This sounds like it's going to be fun," and Rose to weakly smile back. She wasn't liking Neville at the moment.

"Now, instead of role calling, traditionally, I try to do something different on the first day. For all of you, I put your names on a list next to someone from the opposite house. You will find them, briefly converse, and maybe share some interesting information with them. After a couple of minutes, I'll ask everyone to share something to the class, not about themselves, but about their partner. Sounds fun?" Rose could feel Christy's excitement next to her, but most of the class didn't seem too enthusiastic. Neville flicked his wand at the board, where the list of partners appeared and said, "Okay, get started!"

No one moved.

How were they supposed to know who their partner was? Where were they supposed to talk to them? Rose sighed, this wasn't going to fun. She searched for her name on the board, next to it was…Scorpius Malfoy.

Well, now new problems arose.

No one in the class actually stood of from their chair.

No one spoke.

The silence and awkwardness settled down and surrounded everyone. Even Christy didn't speak up, not wanting to be  _that_  first person.

Finally, sensing the tensions, Neville spoke, "You won't find your partner next to you, stand up everyone."

Shuffling to her feat, Rose quickly glanced around the room for Malfoy. Easy to spot with that blond hair, she quickly spotted him. Internally, she debated whether she should walk toward him or wait for him to approach her. She tried not looking at his arrows too much, but her interest spiked when she noticed her name. At least for now, they were going to become friends after this activity.

Next to her, she heard Christy exclaim, "Hey, I have Meredith Zabini. Do you want to come over here? I'm Christy. Or I could meet you?"

That prompted everyone to do the same, and finally Malfoy glanced in her direction. Rose took a deep breath, took it as a good sign that his arrows didn't change when he saw her, gave a slight smile, and walked toward him. Merlin, this was going to be, at best, beyond awkward.

He was standing near the edge of the long table, so Rose took a seat at the table, and he followed.

"Hi, it's Rose, right?"

"Yep, Hi."

They both glanced away as they sifted through their minds for something to say.

Rose held back a sigh, she hated this. Hated the pressure the paths put on her. She would know if she messed up this conversation, because she wouldn't be in his future anymore. Not that she would care too much, but still, the pressure of perfection weighed down on her constantly.

And she hated it.

Rose forced herself to look away from the floor and look at him. She couldn't meet his eyes, she always had trouble with eye contact with strangers, so she focused her attention to the side of his face.

She racked her thoughts for something to say, but came up with nothing.

"So, eventful day yesterday, wasn't it?" He said it with a slight smile. Rose wasn't sure whether she detested or liked that he seemed to half-smile as he spoke.

Nevertheless, she surprised herself by chuckling back, "You have no idea. I thought of all the ways my sorting could have gone, and Merlin, the hat bursting into flames wasn't even on my list of worst case scenarios."

"Yeah, it was crazy. One second it was fine, and then out of nowhere the hat matched your hair."

"Hey, watch it, Malfoy," She said but laughed anyway.

"So, Rose, I think you're supposed to tell me something interesting about yourself."

"Well, you and the rest of the school all saw my most embarrassing moment, I think you should tell me something interesting about yourself first. "

"Well, if you insist….my favorite color is purple, " he replied.

"Yeah, well, that's very….boring," Rose told him with a smile, trying to do the smirk thing he did but failing.

"Someone's picky. I like Quiditch. And Quiditch cannot be boring. So there."

"Well—" Rose was cut off by Neville.

"Okay, class, I want you to stay where you are, but we're going to go in a circle and introduce our partners. I'll start with myself."

"Well, I started teaching six years ago and…."

"Rose?" Malfoy whispered.

"Yeah?" Rose glanced at him, taking in his arrows. She usually tried to avoid looking at people's arrows at first if she could help it, but she never could ignore them for a long time. She had been intrigued by his arrows since the beginning. She took it as a good sign that her place didn't change a lot, not that she cared too much.

"I still don't know what to say about you. You didn't tell me anything."

"Umm…my favorite color –" Rose tried to say.

"No, something interesting."

"Well, I don't know. I like to draw. Is that good enough for you?" There was nothing interesting about her aside from the obvious anomaly of her ability to see the future, but she wasn't about to tell that to anyone.

"What do you draw?" He asked. Rose wasn't expecting this whispering conversation to go on for this long. She glanced around the room, making sure no one noticed that they weren't exactly paying attention. Neville had finished speaking and now Lillian, one of her roommates, (Rose just caught her name) spoke about her partner Harry.

"I draw mostly just people, and how I see them, I guess. And I paint general stuff, like flowers and scenery." Rose surprised herself with the words that came out of her mouth. She wasn't sure why she just told him that. Usually, it took her a while to warm up to people, and a long time to tell them anything personal about herself.

"So, you like drawing roses?" He was doing that half smiling thing again.

Rose groaned, "Haha, very original. Roses are actually very boring to draw, there's nothing really special about them."

Malfoy mumbled something back, but she didn't catch what he said.

The conversation ended and both of them started actually listening to the class, some people were funny, most were awkward, some were loud, but most of them quite. Finally, they got to her group.

Malfoy stood up, "This is Rose, she's a Gryffindor, she likes to draw, and her favorite colour is orange." Rose glanced at him with a questioning look, how did he know that, she never even mentioned it. He just smiled in response. Probably just a lucky guess.

Rose stumbled up from her stool, almost knocking it down as she stood, "Umm, this is Scorpius, he's a Slytherin, he likes purple and believes Quiditch is the best thing ever."

Just because she knew he wanted her to ask him about the orange, she pointedly looked away. They didn't speak until Neville told them to go back to their seats.

"So, I'm guessing you don't want to know how I knew your favorite colour?" He said as they walked back to their previous seats.

"Who says I didn't already figure it out?" Rose gave him a quick smile and garbed her seat next to Christy. Actually, she had no idea how he knew. And she wouldn't admit it, but she was actually curious at how confident he was that orange was her favorite colour. She would figure it out eventually.

"Looks like you two got along," Christy told her as she took her seat.

"Yeah….I guess we did. Weird."


	5. Chapter 5

Herbology went on without that many awkward incidents. Rose could tell how much Neville enjoyed the plants by the enthusiasm inflecting off his voice. Toward the end of the class, as everyone was packing up, Neville asked her to stay behind for a moment. Christy glanced at her, probably thinking Rose was in trouble.

"Oh, you could go with Lillian and everyone Christy, I'll see you in Transfiguration. He's a family friend; he probably just wants to talk about yesterday." It was the first time she mentioned it to her.

"Alright, if you're sure. I'll see you in class. Oh, and I'll save you a seat. Make sure you don't stay too long, you don't want to be late on the first day. Okay, see you, bye!" Christy gave her a smile and headed out with the rest of the Gryffindor girls.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Scorpius walking behind her and leaving the classroom. On instinct she turned around and they made eye contact, his grey eyes meeting her blue ones for the first time. She felt strange the moment it happened, but she didn't avert her eyes right away. Malfoy seemed to stand there for a while, his face questioning before Rose looked away and walked toward Neville. She shook her head, that had been the strangest thing.

"Hi, Rose, I just wanted to make sure you were doing alright. You seem better than I expected after yesterday's incident."

"Yeah, thanks Neville or, err…Professor Longbottom," Rose said chuckling awkwardly. "I guess it's better to move on than keep thinking about it and freaking myself out. Did you write to Mum and Dad? I haven't got a chance to, but I know they'll freak out when they hear."

"You can still call me Neville when there's no one around, Rose. And yes, right after the sorting I sent them a letter. I'm sure you'll hear from them soon."

"Oh, wonderful then, can't wait for that letter," Rose sighed, "I should get to my next class, could you tell me how to get to Transfiguration?" Neville pointed her in the right direction and they parted. He told her not to worry about being late since there was a longer gap between classes for the first week.

As Rose roamed the corridors, she couldn't help but notice how different she felt walking down them compared to this morning. With Christy, it didn't feel that overwhelming. Now as she walked, there was nothing distracting her from the array of arrows over everyone's head as they passed her. Rose wondered if she would ever get used to the feeling of the future all around her.

Walking into Transfiguration actually was actually a relief. Rose smiled as the number of arrows and paths in the room decreased significantly to an ignorable level. After she walked down the halls with so many people moving so quickly in so many directions, the room felt like a sunny day amiss a storm. Christy saved her a seat, and, much to her surprise, she was also sitting next to Al and another boy. Rose settled in, thankful that their seats weren't too close to the teacher that she would have to evade awkward eye contact and not too far as to get distracted by the paths of other students.

Professor Sharma introduced herself and Rose recalled that she was the one who talked to all of them prior to the sorting. She seemed like a nice teacher, but after having Neville, she paled in compression. Soon they were practicing; wand flicks and pronunciation and the whens and whys and hows of transfiguration. Sharma was going around the classroom helping the students that were struggling with the wand movement, which gave Rose a chance to catch up with Al, who told her what a bore History of Magic was. He introduced both Christy and Rose to his friend, Joshua Spieral, who seemed engrossed in the lesson Sharma taught and took careful, color-coded notes.

"I promise, he's funner than he appears," Al mock whispered when Joshua said a quick hi and resumed to perfecting his notes.

"Oh, shove off Al," was his response. A few seconds later Al made a rather loud noise and shook his leg back and forth. Joshua just smirked at him. Rose, Christy, and Joshua laughed, and Rose smiled at Joshua, really looking at his arrows for the first time. She saw that he had an older sister, one that he missed quite a lot when he was at home. He was muggle born and afraid that he wouldn't get to go to the school his sister went to. For now, though, he and his sister wouldn't be as close as they used to be. He would try meeting with her a couple times, only to be interrupted by her friends or get casted aside for homework. However, his friendship with Al seemed good for him, it lasted for a long time and through Al, he made more friends.

"Rose, you okay? You zoned out for a while there." Christy asked. Rose didn't realize how long she had been staring at his arrows. It actually surprised her how much information she learned from his arrows. There were always those few people that had arrows that revealed so much, exposing their past along with their future. People like that always mesmerized Rose at first, but guilt usually followed, as she realized the intrusion of privacy for someone she barely knew. But she had to admit, after trying to figure out Scorpius's vague arrows, Joshua's seemed so much nicer to look at in comparison.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Probably just a bit tired," answering the question a little too late.

Al asked Rose and Christy how their last class was, and even though she wanted to tell Al all about Malfoy and Herbology for some reason she felt a stronger urge to keep it to herself.

"Not much, really," Rose practiced her wan movement as Sharma came around to their table, making sure they were doing the motion correctly.

Of course, Rose wasn't able to keep that sentiment for long; Christy soon began a rather dramatic telling of what happened, especially when it concerned Rose and her partner, Al looked at Rose in an exaggerated appalled face.

"And Rose, you managed to leave all of this out of your rather pathetic explanation of what happened last class. I knew Neville would be interesting! And you and Malfoy? Who would have thought, but it's okay, I'm not judging." Al said.

"Well…I wanted it to be a surprise." Rose told him weakly, shooting a glare at Christy, who just looked confused.

"You wanted to surprise us by bringing Malfoy over for holidays as your boyfriend without any of us being prep—" Al started.

"No I meant the class to be…and oh shut it! Merlin, we were partners in some game not snogging in the halls." Rose got out, feeling herself grow red with embarrassment.

"Careful Rose, you wouldn't want to be sharing your dreams with the whole class, and well your face would—" Al started.

"Okay, okay calm down guys. I might have exaggerated a little, Al, and I'm sorry Rose. They're not even friends yet, Al. Let's hold off on the teasing until then." Christy said intervening, but looked far too amused for Rose's liking.

Al chuckled at that, which got Rose to laugh and soon Christy joined in. It probably wasn't a good first impression but honestly all of it seemed easier than she would have imagined. When she wasn't surrounded by so many people and wasn't listening to the rumors that might be circulating around about her, it wasn't difficult for her to be happy.

The first week of classes went by before Rose realized it. Life continued without much disappointment or too many embarrassing situations. It wasn't really going to be as bad as she imagined. James was probably right, most people seemed to ignore or not care about what had happened the first day when she set the hat on fire. Of course, whispers sometimes followed her, some people pointed, and a few even questioned her about it. When that happened, luckily she wasn't alone and it really wasn't as bad as she thought it was going to be. On the first day it seemed too much for her to imagine, appeared as if she would implode with all the attention and questioning eyes paired with the arrows. But it wasn't that bad.

"Rose, c'mon we're going to play Exploding Snap! We're waiting for you," Lillian said, ending her reflections. She agreed and joined the others, Mary, Olivia, and Amelia. They had grown closer in a week, and at the least, Rose knew all their names. Christy remained the closest to her, and it helped that her and Al quickly became friends too. Rose knew that wouldn't last long, just judging by Christy's friendly personality and her arrows, but Rose pushed that thought aside.

Over the weekend, she received a letter from her parents, who mainly told her not to worry about the hat and asked how everything else was and how her classes were and had she made friends and how was it like being a Gryffindor and how were James and Al and were the older kids aren't mean. As Rose scanned the letter with furred eyebrows, she realized it didn't have many questions—that many questions about the Sorting Hat. She was expecting many questions, especially from Dad, but she was glad she was wrong.

Even with its small appearance of the events that occurred on her first day, the letter got her thinking about the Sorting Hat all over again, and she couldn't help but realize that there lay a connection between her ability to see the paths and the hat exploding. The thought manifested in her head and it took up a large part of the weekend contemplating what actually happened.

Rose couldn't help but fear that the Headmaster and staff would come to the same conclusion and realize that there was obviously something wrong with her. Then she would be taken away from Hogwarts, put into some hospital or empty white room and the tests and the potions and the speculations to examine her, to figure out why she could see the arrows. But however long she stayed in her bed conjuring up—or attempting to conjure up solutions—she always arrived at the same conclusion—there wasn't anything she could do to stop them from investigating. Rose couldn't stop anyone from figuring out why the Sorting Hat blazed with fire while it was in content with her, couldn't stop them from caring as quickly as most of the students had and meanwhile she wouldn't even know how to know for herself how or if she was the one to do so. Rose sighed, she wanted to know why the hat went into flames, but didn't know where to begin; she didn't want anyone thinking she was different, but she had no idea how to stop opinions from forming; she wanted be normal, wanted to be free from the arrows, but knew that would never be an option.

After spending a little too much time inside her bed with the curtains drawn, Christy seemed to realize there was an issue. Sunday afternoon Christy somehow got Rose to smile, managed to grab Rose out of bed, made her laugh, and succeeded in getting her to take a walk around the castle with the other girls from Gryffindor. She didn't ask any questions and Rose liked her that much more for it.

They had Astronomy Monday evening with the Slytherins, and though Rose found the class interesting, she couldn't stop herself from glancing at Scorpius quite frequently, much to her annoyance. Although she tried, Rose couldn't make out the words lining Malfoy's paths due to both the darkness and distance. It bothered her how much she cared, but she couldn't stop herself from trying to read them, to see if they changed, to see if her place in them had changed. She didn't get a chance to speak to him, though. Near the end of class, he glanced her way and smiled, and Rose smiled back. Christy noticed the whole affair and misinterpreted the whole situation, and Rose hated the look Christy was getting and the direction her arrows were taking.

Rose tried to escape once they reached Gryffindor Tower, but Christy knowing what she was doing, grabbed Rose and pulled her onto one of the empty couches.

"Rose, Merlin, you so like him. I knew it! I can't believe it! And Al was right too, who would have thought? And both of you will look so cute together and oh, I can't wait until the two of you go out! And I –"

"Christy, you're mental. And being overly dramatic. I don't like him, we're barely even friends. And calm down, everyones giving us weird looks."

"Oh, Rose, it's okay I won't tell anyone. And there's barely anyone in here, and even if they were they wouldn't care what we were saying. But anyway, I know how to keep a secret, believe me. Most people think I can't because apparently I talk a lot but I know how to control what I say—really." Rose glanced at her arrows quickly, and they showed that she wouldn't tell anybody, which wasn't surprising. Christy was proving to be a great friend, although she seemed a little too ready to jump to conclusions.

"No, but really, Christy, I don't like him."

"Whatever you say, Rose." She said smiling sweetly, and adding, " I saw you looking at him at least every minute."

"Christy, no, no, you got it wrong. I wasn't looking at him. I was just..wondering if we were friends or if I should talk to him or if I should wave a hello. I mean, you probably don't understand that because when you want to talk to someone you just do, but I'm not good at starting conversations and I never really know what I should say to people." Which was more or less the truth. It surprised Rose how much she shared with Christy. Generally, it was impossible to get Rose to share information about herself, but with Christy, Rose almost didn't realize what she shared. It seemed too easy.

"Oh! Rose, I get it! I mean, just because I talk to people easily doesn't mean I don't get nervous. And I get why you were looking at him to, it makes sense." And Rose really believed she did get it.

"So you know that I don't like him, right?" Rose said, just to clarify everything with Christy before they had more conversations like this.

"Yeah, I know you don't like him…for now." Christy said giggling and ran up to the dorms before Rose could do anything in response.


	6. Chapter 6

Rose kept pretending that everything was all right. She took copious notes, answered several of Neville's questions, interacted with the plants, and earned points for Gryffindor. When she caught herself thinking about it, she silently shook her head and pushed the thought away with full force. It worked for a while and she was all right. Everything was all right. Why wouldn't it be?

Then once or twice, before she could catch herself, almost like a reflex, she looked at him. Thank Merlin he never looked in her direction because he would have had to bear witness to the look of disappointment etched onto her face followed promptly with anger before her eyes snapped away from him, before realizing what she was doing. Then she shook her head and continued to do whatever to keep her mind somewhat busy. Because everything was all right.

Herbology felt never-ending that day. When finally it ended, Rose impatiently stood waiting for Christy to gather her things. Merlin if she didn't get out of the room soon she knew something—or worse nothing—would happen. Rose kept her head down because she wouldn't know what to say or do if she came face to face with him.

* * *

The rest of the day proceeded in the same way. By dinner Rose had a pounding headache and as she was glad to at least have an excuse ready for her strange behavior, it was better than telling them what was really bothering her. Al dragged Rose to the nurse, lecturing her to get it treated before it got worse.

Since she was little Rose had the worst headaches that went on for days at a time. Though easily cured with some headache potion, Rose always refused to take it. She wouldn't tell anyone about the headaches until they got in the most critical stage, and she wouldn't take potion until it was absolutely necessary. Over time, her family recognized the patterns and even though she received thousands of lectures from Mum and everyone else, she still wouldn't tell anyone when she felt one coming on. To Rose's displeasure, almost everyone in her family could now tell when Rose wasn't feeling well. Under normal circumstances, she would have tried harder to conceal it around Al, but she just didn't have it in her to do that.

Rose just didn't like depending on something else, some vague substance, to make her feel better. Because what if one day it wasn't there anymore, what if one day it disappeared, and she was left aching in pain because she was too scared to let herself experience what it really felt like.

So with little to no protests she went to the nurse and silently stared at the ground as Al told Madame Plery all about the headaches. There was nothing she could do to stop Al once he put his mind to something, and Rose saw it embedded in his arrows that this talk was going to happen the moment Al caught sight of her face. So even though she was reluctant, she listened and took the potion and laid on the hospital bed.

At last, when no one was around her, Rose let the thoughts that had been threatening to drown her all day flood over for a moment.

She hated how much she thought about it, how much she really shouldn't care. But this is what happens if she gets hopeful. Rose had been counting on that one clear path of Malfoy's to stay consistent, for them to be friends. And Rose had no idea why it was affecting her so badly that the path was removed from his future. Because when she thought about it, about him, she realized how much she shouldn't care, and how much she obviously did. For some reason she got along with Malfoy that first day and somehow he managed to guess her favorite colour and at the moment they had the potential to be friends and all of it seemed so wonderful. But looking back on it, it really shouldn't have mattered. Especially with her experience with the future, Rose hated herself for having such high expectations that set her up for the exact disappointment she always dreaded and was currently feeling.

Though, this was the first time the disappointment included herself. Before this, the unpredictability of the future and the mistakes and choices people made that left their emotions in ruins never affected her personally. Now, she could say earnestly that though it was difficult dealing with the possible futures of everyone around her, it was so much worse dealing with the future and the mistakes she made and the things that could have changed when it involved her.

Rose sighed and turned over in bed. She hated being exactly what she was now—and overdramatic girl thinking about a boy and what she could have done differently. She had been reading books about this since the age of six, the obnoxious girls that though of only boys who didn't give them the time of day. She wasn't going to be a cliché girl in a stupid children's book. No. She was going to put this miniscule shift in the future aside and pretend until she believed that nothing was wrong. Because why would any of it, why would he, even matter? He was just a stupid boy that she used to randomly associate with. It wouldn't impact her day to day life. Rose wasn't about to let it.

* * *

Rose prided herself on pretending, pretending that she didn't see the future, pretending that she was all right, pretending that she was happy all the time. So if anyone noticed her reservations with people: how she created a shy exterior when meeting new people, how she isolated herself, how she kept every conversation brief and purposeful, no one said anything. Christy and Al didn't bring up Malfoy in conversation. And Rose barely thought about him. In the past two months, Rose and Malfoy hadn't had a conversation but sometimes if they saw each other in the corridors they would briefly nod at each other.

Much to James's annoyance, Rose found herself spending most of her time in the library alone. It was just easier to be alone, easier to pretend she was normal and everything was okay when she wasn't suffocated by the future and disappointments wherever she went. Christy didn't care much for her grades, so whenever Christy asked her to hang out with her other friends Rose would give the excuse of homework or studying and escape to the library. And Al spent most of his time with his Ravenclaw friends, and the couple of times he came over to her table with them, Al could see how uncomfortable Rose got and eventually stopped trying.

Rose didn't do it because of Malfoy. Of course not. Rose had just gotten too caught up in wanting everything to be okay and wonderful and easy that she started believing it, until she realized that the world didn't work like that, the arrows didn't work like that, that nothing was easy when she saw how terrible everything had the potential to be, and that optimism always led to disappointments.

It was Halloween when she was ambushed.

She was sitting in the library minding her own business when suddenly four chairs were conjured up around her and in those chairs sat Christy, Al, James, and Victoire (who she had barely spoken to in Hogwarts).

Christy spoke first, "Rose, we are done pretending. We were hoping that this mood of yours would pass and that you were maybe homesick or worried about what happened your first day or just shy but your family knows you better than that and there is something wrong and you are going to tell us. We're not leaving you alone until you spill. So you better start talking. I've tried figuring it out, but you just push the questions away and dodge them so easily, but not this time. So speak." Rose just looked at Christy (who could be quite scary) and then the others wide eyed. She should have seen this coming. Her family was too bloody intrusive to let her behavior slip by without explanation. But she didn't have time to think of that now, she needed to figure out something to tell them. Again, lying was not her specialty but the truth wasn't an option. She had no idea what to do.

When she didn't say anything, James spoke up, "Look, Rose, c'mon. We all know that you're all secretive and everything and you don't have to tell us everything, but that doesn't mean you spend all of your time cooped up in the library like a depressed prefect. Just tell us and we'll leave you alone."

"I don't know what you guys are talking about," it was lame but she had no other options on hand other than denial.

"Rose, please, don't lie to us. We all care about you. And telling us is easier than the alternative. Al and James wanted to go and write to your parents before talking to you! I mean how horrible would that have been? But anyway, I convinced them to try this first." Rose shot both of them a dirty look, but they didn't look apologetic in the least…well maybe Al did. But her mum and dad would freak out if her cousins wrote to them. There would be endless questions and too much worrying at her expense and it would create endless drama for infinite years.

"Rose, we know how stubborn you are, so we didn't think there was any other option. We know it's something big and we won't tell Aunt Hermione or Uncle Ron if you just tell us what's wrong. Please?" Al begged.

Rose sighed. There wasn't a way out. She was going to make it up as she spoke.

"Fine, you caught me, something's wrong."

"Merlin! Really, Rose? I thought we were all going mental, questioning you about a problem that doesn't exist. Glad that we have that cleared out of the way so—."

"Al, shut up. This is obviously difficult for her, let's tone down the sarcasm," Vic said.

"So..." James prompted.

Rose sighed glancing around the library. No one was around; they were in one of the secluded corners Rose loved. She fixed her eyes on a red book on the bookshelf three rows down and started speaking. She didn't know what she was going to say, but knew definitely that not a word would be spoken about the arrows.

"Umm..well…you see….I just—I just..I mean all of its just—I mean," Rose took a breath and spoke quickly before she changed her mind, "I mean everything is just so much harder than I thought it would be. Everything. I thought it would be easier." Rose flinched at the break in her voice. She hated talking about her feelings; she always got so emotional. She hated crying in front of people. But what she said was more or less the truth.

"Oh, Rose," Christy whispered.

Rose slouched in her chair, refusing to meet anyone's eye; she still had her eyes trained on that red book. She closed her eyes as she heard them whisper among themselves, droning it all out. But she did hear the chairs scrape against the floor, felt a few pats on her shoulder, followed by retreating footsteps. Relief flooded her; they were going to leaver alone. Though it was very out of character, Rose decided not to question it. Rose sat up in her seat, and opened her eyes. She had a Potions paper to get back to.

But to her immense disappointment, when she opened her eyes, Victoire was still there. Rose groaned.

"I though all of you were going to leave me alone."

"You can't get rid of us that easily, Rose, you know that."

"But why are you still here. Everyone else decided that that my explanation was good enough."

"We had it all planed out, Rose. Depending on what you were vaguely going to tell us, we would leave one person here to make you feel better and get you to share more of your feelings, since apparently, it seems like a foreign concept to you." Victoire explained. Rose couldn't believe that they planned this so carefully and yet she missed it in their arrows. But then again, these days, she barely held conversations long enough to look at the paths.

"So, since they deemed me the best to deal with this, let's talk, okay? We can take a walk outside; it's just starting to get dark. Let's go." Rose hopelessly followed Victoire. They walked in silence for a while until Vic started up the conversation again.

"Rose, believe me, I understand what you're going through," Vic started. Rose had to stop herself from snorting in disagreement. "Just hear me out, okay? I know how hard all of it seems at first. It's like…when you're little you have all these dreams and fantasies and hopes. And in all of them everything works out at the end. But then something new comes up, like you start Hogwarts, and all of these dreams and fantasies get focused on this one thing. And there are all these expectations of perfection and of instant happiness and of everything working out and I think you know that nothing works out exactly as you imagine it to. And it hurts, because disappointment hurts, and the first time, especially, hurts the most. But eventually, everything will be okay, I promise. Because you have to let yourself get over these disappointments, you need to get over them because you have to start dreaming and hoping and wishing all over again. Because if you don't, if you just sit and refuse to have hope and grow lonely and tell yourself you'll never have these expectation ever again, there isn't really anything to really live for anymore. So I know all these disappointments hurt, but I promise you, it's worth it to have hope and be optimistic, because as long as you keep believing, everything will work itself out at the end."

Rose just stared at Victoire in awe. How did she know what Rose was feeling? Did she know about the paths? And how did she know for sure that everything was going to work out if she didn't even see the paths herself? Because Rose knew for sure that everything wasn't always going to work out. But Rose forced herself to stop thinking and take in Vic's words. And as they sunk in, Rose felt a smile creeping up on her face and it felt strange, almost as if she forgot the motion existed. She felt better, felt hopeful that everything in her life wouldn't be clouded by disappointments.

Rose just continued to stare at Victoire, but really, how did she know what to say to her? Rose's confused face probably gave her away, because Vic answered, "Don't worry, I don't know exactly what's bothering you or how big the problem is and I won't ask. I just want you to know that even though everyone may not have the same problems that you may have, most people have the same emotions and fears and doubts and it feels better to go to someone when you're feeling down and let them help you sort it out. Don't keep it bottled up, Rose, because you'll just explode. Okay?"

"Okay." Rose didn't know what else to say, but Vic seemed to understand that her words had some lasting effect on Rose.

"And don't worry, I'll talk to the other and tell them you're doing fine. And remember, you can always come to me if you need help or advice or anything. Okay?"

"Okay…and umm..thanks Vic," Rose said smiling.

"No problem, Rose, and like I said, anytime. Now let's get to the feast, I think it probably started by now."


	7. Chapter 7

Before Rose knew it, Christmas break was upon them. November transitioned into December and the dried up leaves to small snowflakes and Rose grew busy with Christy and Al and everyone else while attempting to fit in time to balance her schoolwork and study for exams. To everyone's relief, after Halloween, Rose had slowly drifted back to her normal self; her time in the library decreased and she fit in time to spend with people rather than shifting them aside.

Herbology and Astronomy continued to have no relevance in her life and Malfoy's arrow still hadn't changed and that was probably a good thing, because Rose finally felt that she didn't care anymore. She was okay with the fact that his future had shifted and that she wouldn't be in it as his friend. Rose had no clue what Vic told her nosy cousins and friend, but James, Al, and Christy surprisingly ended most of the questioning about her wellbeing. The jokes about Malfoy had stopped too and Rose was interested to know what Vic had said, but she didn't want to bring up the topic, especially two months after the fact.

Slowly, life at Hogwarts became something Rose enjoyed. She liked her friends and the independence it brought. Rose could decide, mostly, what she wanted to do with her time when there weren't any classes and when Christy wasn't being especially bossy about getting Rose to socialize with different people. It wasn't that Rose didn't want to make more friends, it wasn't that she was scared to either. Mostly, Rose felt content about her life again. Everything felt right and normal (or as normal as it would get) and Rose didn't want to mess with that, at least not this year. Maybe next year, she would attempt to learn more about her roommates and make more friends. But at times, the number of students at Hogwarts still overwhelmed her and Rose tended to flee to her sanctuary at the library. But mostly, that didn't occur too often; usually Christy was by her side cheering Rose up ad keeping her calm without even knowing she was doing so. Rose was truly happy that she found a friend like Christy and had such wonderful cousins; she didn't know what she would do without them.

It was halfway through Christmas break and the family was at Uncle Harry's house for Christmas. Rose scanned the room quickly, lingering on Grandma and Grandpa Weasley, and she breathed a quiet sigh of relief. Sometimes, Rose grew anxious at school. She was used to scanning her family's arrows and paths frequently to ensure that nothing too bad would happen to them in their future. Rose knew the future wasn't set in stone, but she figured out how to avoid unfavorable outcomes that took advantage of variability of the future. She learned how to set distractions so the future wouldn't pan out too badly.

One time, when she was ten, her mum's arrows told Rose that she would be getting attacked later that day. So Rose, who had already had a bad headache, told her mum she wasn't feeling well in the hopes that her mum would offer to stay home with her. Because Rose rarely told anyone about her headaches or when she wasn't feeling well, Rose's mum assumed it was a very critical stage of the headache and stayed home with Rose. When her mum made that decision, the path that foretold her injuries disappeared. The next day, news of a wizarding attack in Muggle London spread. Rose picked up the newspaper that gave a number to those affected and described the various injuries of muggles, witches, and wizards. A mixture of guilt with a bit of relief washed over Rose—Rose wasn't able to help anyone else, but at least her mum was safe.

But anyway, for now, Rose enjoyed her meal with her family, reveling in the fact that everything was alright, well, at least for now.

After dinner Al, Rose, James, Hugo, Lily, Fred, Dominique, and Roxy went upstairs while the adults made themselves comfortable on the couch and Vic and Teddy sat in a secluded corner and the babies napped in the other room.

Once they were inside the room Lily started. "Rose! You have to tell me everything. Mum and Daddy told me I'm not allowed to but I need to know. What happened with the Sorting Hat? And what about boys? Are they cute there? Do you have a boyfriend yet? I just broke up with Franky the other day, and I just need to move on. No, but first, tell me about the hat."

James and Al gave Lilly a horrified look and both begun to talk at the same time.

"Lily you're ten years old and you aren't allowed to know boys exist, much less date them!" Al said.

"I'm going to blindfold you, or better yet, find a blinding spell. Boys are not allowed to be cute! They don't exist, Lily." James said in panic.

Everyone else laughed, as Lily replied, "Just because you don't find them attractive doesn't mean I don't. I mean, Freddy had the most gorgeous blue eyes and brown curly hair, and his hand were so soft." James and Al looked incoherent, their eyes wide while James's arms moved frantically and Al sputtering out a, "I'm going to tell Mum!"

"She knows." Lily replied with a smile. They looked defeated, and unwillingly Rose felt she had to intervene to avoid the infamous Potter arguments.

"So, Lily, don't you want to her about the Sorting Hat?"

Coming back to Hogwarts after break felt like the first day of school all over again, well, except for the whole Sorting Hat fiasco and everything. But after a week devoid of thousands of arrows and paths, all the students at Hogwarts seemed a little overwhelming. But like always, Christy was especially helpful without even trying to be. Christy kept Rose immersed in the stories she about her holidays while both of them were walking in the corridors and whenever there was any spare time. As they were walking toward Herbology, Christy was telling the story of her little brother's Christmas present.

"So Henry was lying in his bed, it was probably nine in the morning, who even sleeps in on Christmas day, I don't even sleep in that late. But anyway, he was sleeping, and then me, my mum, and my dad snuck up into his room and placed his present on his stomach. The gift started rolling over and barking and Henry woke up screaming and when he saw the puppy with a couple of big ribbons on it he got out of bed and hugged all of us. It was great and …"

They stepped inside the classroom and the smile Rose had been wearing while listening to the story came to an abrupt end. She glanced a Malfoy and her heart stopped. Bloody Hell.

His arrows. She stopped listening to Mary, she tuned everything out. She couldn't breathe. Suddenly, the room felt too small and everything around her felt like it was spinning.

What was she going to do—Merlin, what was she going to do—would she tell him—but how could she stop it—Why was it happening—bloody hell what was she going to do. She couldn't do this, she really, really, really couldn't do this, it was too much to handle and why did the world hate her so much because she couldn't fix this, she couldn't fix it at all this time but she would never forgive herself if she failed. She tried to take deep breaths because that's what Mum said to do in stressful situations but something like this was probably not what she had in mind because her heart was pounding too too fast and her breath was shallow and she felt like she was going to burst and before she knew it the spinning room and thoughts and everything was too much and she was falling.

The next thing she knew, she heard Neville's voice and felt what she assumed was Christy's hand gripping her arm.

"I'll levitate her to the Hospital Wing," Neville said. Rose tried to open her eyes, they fluttered and finally opened. Neville was looking down at her and she was on the floor of the Herbology classroom. She must have fainted.

"Wait, Sir, she opened her eyes! Rose? Rose? Rose! Are you okay? Can you hear me?" Christy said frantically.

"Yeah…I—err—think I'm fine. What happened?" Rose tried to sit up but she must have hit her head because it was vibrating. Then she remembered. Malfoy's arrows.

The couple of vague arrows he had pointing right at everything she always feared she would see in everyone's arrows—death. The irreversible end to everything. Maybe, if it had been a simple cause, maybe a fight or a dual or even an accident, it would have been easy to prevent it—but what felt unconceivable, the reason Rose felt so helpless and cornered— in his future, in his arrows, Malfoy would die because of Rose.

Soon Rose was being levitated to the Hospital Wing. Despite the deliberate slowness and care of the person who was controlling it, she still felt dizzy. But soon enough, she was lying on a hospital bed answering the constant spew of questions from the nurse. Rose was eventually left alone with her thoughts—and she was starting to think it was better when Plery was questioning her, at least then she had a distraction for her impending problem.

Now, all Rose could do was concentrate on his arrows. Rose saw that Malfoy learned, probably over the holidays, Legilimency. Her stomach lurched, and her finger begun tapping erratically beside her and she finally understood. She didn't understand what she was going to do, but she understood why, at least. Malfoy would die if he read her mind and saw his own arrows in them. Just like the Sorting Hat. It burst into flames because it couldn't handle seeing its own future, it was too much for anyone to handle, and in result flames erupted.

Rose felt sick.

She could learn Occlumency…but would that be enough? And how would she learn fast enough? Maybe it was best to stay in the hospital wing forever, maybe then she wouldn't be responsible for anyone's death.


	8. Chapter 8

Recap: Rose came back from winter break when she saw that Scorpius's arrows were pointed towards death. Rose fainted when she saw that she was the one responsible for it.

The next day, Rose woke up hoping that everything from yesterday had all been a horrible, horrible nightmare. But of course, life didn't work like that, at least Rose's didn't, because she woke up in a hospital bed with a raging headache. The desire to curl up into a ball and pull the covers over her aching head was a losing battle. She never wanted to have to deal with life again.

Because she was only bloody eleven years old. She wasn't supposed to be worrying about death or have to deal with it. All she wanted right now was her mum. She had absolutely no bloody idea of what to do. Her breaths were getting shorter and faster. There was an urgent feeling of panic in the pit of her stomach and tears were gathering in her eyes; she was losing control of herself. Why did she have to be different? Why did she have to see the bloody future in those miserable paths and blasted arrows and Merlin, she hated her life.

Footsteps interrupted her inner anguish and Rose quickly shut her eyes and attempted to clear her head. She quickly wiped away her tears, hoping it was just Madame Plery and not Al, Christy, or James walking towards her because she just couldn't handle their endless onset of questions when her thoughts weren't exactly coherent. Besides, her emotions were too out of control for her to lie decently.

"Rose! Are you okay? I know you're awake so you can stop pretending." It was Christy. What did life have against Rose? Why did it wish to constantly torture her like this?

"Rose, please? I just want to see how you're feeling, I mean, well you're obviously not okay but please? I woke up early just for you, and you know I'm just going to keep talking and bring misery into your life and soon you'll go crazy because no one can—"

Rose actually managed to smile. Her face felt strained and it felt like it had been ages since she had last performed such an action.

"Christy, you're worse than Al…I didn't know anyone else could be more obnoxious."

"Thanks, Rose, but really, you need to tell people how you're feeling. I thought you got a little better because at least you told Victoire something but I don't think people faint out of nowhere for no reason. Are you eating? Is it self-image issues? Rose you can't not eat—"

"Christy, no. I do eat, you've seen me eat on a daily basis. And I'm fine—or at least I will be. But really, Christy, I really, really don't feel like talking to anyone right now, I just—I just need some time to figure things out and I don't know why am I telling you this but really, nothing is ever going to be okay because nothing ever works out and I don't know what to do." It all just came pouring out of Rose's mouth and she wasn't aware of it all. Rose's eyes pooled with tears and she tried to turn away; she hated how emotional she was being. Christy saw the tears and enveloped Rose in a tight hug.

Rose managed to pull herself together and quickly reassured Christy that she had no clue what she was saying. She added that Plery had given her a sleeping drought, which had been hampering her ability to speak properly. Christy went along with it. At this point, Rose didn't care anymore and she wanted Christy to leave because it was once again getting too much to handle.

Christy was finally leaving but as a final thought to Rose, she said, "You know that you can tell me anything, right? Something is obviously bothering you, Rose, and I know that I'm definitely not stubborn or headstrong enough to get it out of you and I'm not sure if anyone is, but you should remember that there are people that can help with whatever it is that's going on. Okay?"

But no one would understand what Rose was going through, and Rose knew she couldn't ask for anyone's help because that would require years' worth of explaining. But instead of telling Christy that, something else fell from Rose's lips before she could stop herself from saying anything.

"What do you think about destiny—or about the future?" Rose asked Christy.

When Rose realized what she had said and how close she had come to telling Christy, Rose couldn't belive herself. But—maybe, just maybe, Christy would know what to do. Maybe, maybe there was hope.

If Christy was surprised at Rose's random question, she didn't show it; she answered without hesitation. "Well, I guess I believe in serendipity, you know, that everything happens for a reason? And I guess it kinda makes everything so much less stressful because, I mean, if it happens it's part of my destiny, and if it doesn't it just wasn't meant to be. It sounds kind of weird saying it out loud, but I like to think that someone is out there guiding me through everything and making sure I make the right decisions. So I'm sure that everything's going to work out for you in the end, whatever your problem is."

Rose's heart sank but she managed to smile and thank Christy as the latter left for breakfast. Though Rose probably wouldn't have told Christy about the arrows, she now knew that she wouldn't be able to tell Christy, ever, even if she wanted to. Rose didn't want to change or spoil Christy's views on destiny by telling her about the arrows. No one deserved to have that burden thrown on them.

But Christy was out of the picture now and Rose was still helpless about keeping Malfoy alive. Plery was now walking towards her and, knowing her, would ask far too many questions which Rose didn't think she could handle, at least not in the foreseeable future.

In the afternoon, Al and James visited her separately, or so she was told by Plery, who hadn't let them in. Rose was thankful that Plery had shooed them away. Rose could tell that Plery's arrows kept alternating between keeping Rose in the wing another night or discharging her, so Rose took every opportunity to prove to Plery that she wasn't doing better, which really wasn't that difficult seeing as Rose wasn't doing too well to being with.

Victoire came to visit Rose that evening. Rose was slightly surprised to see her. She didn't know how Victoire had managed to convince Plery to let her in, since Plery was very strict about patients being visited in the later hours.

"Hey, Rose, I've heard that you had a little incident in Herbology the other day. Neville was pretty worried, how are you? What happened?"

"I'm fine, Vic, no point in worrying. I don't know why I fainted, I just remembering feeling dizzy and then it just happened."

"Rose, I think that your life would be ten times simpler if you just agreed to share your feelings once in a while. Or maybe, possibly share them when there's something that causes you to faint. Plery still doesn't understand what caused such a reaction, but just looking at you now I can tell that there's something bothering you. Rose, I can help. Please, just let me?"

Vic moved to sit on the edge of Rose's bed and pulled her into a hug. While she still was enclosed in Vic's arms, Rose felt tears threatening to fall out of her closed eyes. She hated hugs sometimes, especially when she was really upset because then the tears would begin to fall, almost straight away. Out of nowhere, Rose started to sob. The pressure had gotten to her, had been getting to her and she was never strong enough to deal with something like this anyway. Victoire just held her, mumbling soothing words, yet Rose just cried even harder.

Finally, Victoire allowed Rose to pull away and Rose's hands automatically went to her own face to wipe away her tears. Rose lay down and sighed. She turned away from Victoire and wondered if she was finally ready to tell someone about the arrows. Rose told herself she wasn't ready, but a voice in her head was convincing, pleading, prompting her accept the help Victoire was offering.

"Rose, I'm ready to listen to anything. I promise, I won't tell anyone, not if you don't want me to. I promise I can help, Rose."

Rose opened her mouth and before she changed her mind, in a broken voice she began. "I—I just…I just don't know what to do and I can't do anything and I hate everything about this and—and—and I just can't." Rose spoke quickly, with one breath. She gasped and waited for Victoire's reaction.

"Rose, how about you start from the beginning and I can promise you that we will figure something out. Everything will work out. What I like to do when I get into stressful situations is to think of a time when I'll be able to laugh at whatever's happening, because I know that right now, it seems like the worst thing ever, but sooner, hopefully, rather than later, everything will be okay. Okay? And we have all the time you need. I promised Plery that I would be able to help you feel better and she said I could stay for as long as I want to."

Rose began, only slightly aware of Victoire, who was listening closely to Rose's every word. Vic was rather shocked by Rose's revelation. To Rose, it was as if she was revealing a horrible secret, which was never supposed to be spoken.

She told Vic about her trip to Paris and the day with Al when Rose had realized that no one else could see the arrows. Rose stared up at the white ceiling and tried to forget that Vic was there listening, judging her, taking in her every word. Finally, she reached the part involving Malfoy, about death, about what really happened with the Sorting Hat. Rose felt as if she was slowly inching toward the edge of a cliff; with every word Rose was coming closer and closer to completely revealing herself to Vic. With every word her secret was unraveling, and when she finally stopped, it felt like she was looking down at the cliff, breathlessly wondering if she would find bliss or unbearable pain if she were to fall off the edge.

Rose waited helplessly for Vic's reaction, with her eyes scrunched close and her breath held. She didn't know what to expect—it would either be bliss or pain. But when Vic's arms enveloped her, and she whispered, "Rose, Merlin, Rose—I can't believe you, I can't believe that you would keep this to yourself. I can't even begin to imagine how difficult it must have been. You should have told someone, anyone, about this earlier. So many people love you, Rose, and you shouldn't shy away from the help they're willing to give. But never mind that, Rose, I don't know what to tell you. I can't believe you thought for one second that you had to figure this out by yourself. I want you to promise me that the next time you have a problem you will ask for help and." Here Victoire stopped, drawing breath. "Oh, Rose I'm sorry about the lecture. We'll figure this out, I promise. Everything is going to be okay."

Rose felt as if someone had placed a net at the bottom of the cliff. She was still falling, yet her fear had been replaced with a strange, but welcome, kind of hope.


End file.
